Comments on: While fucking, I prefer to get fucked

By: Oh, RAGE « beyond the hills

Oh, RAGE « beyond the hills — Sun, 19 Oct 2008 19:00:50 +0000

[...] This makes my blood [...]

By: maymay

maymay — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 09:38:09 +0000

@Lula-Neith Cache: You’re welcome. I think that the day when men whose experience of sexuality is more like mine becomes legitimized is the day when I’ll stop getting thanked for writing stuff like this. I eagerly await that day.

Good luck finding those men near you who are like me. :) Hopefully just advertising your own interest in finding such a man will be all that’s needed for success.

By: Lula-Neith Cache

Lula-Neith Cache — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 08:37:29 +0000

Thank you for writing this. Thank you for existing and writing and proving that you exist; therefore proving other men of a similar mindset might be found. Perhaps near me! :)

By: Prophet King Governance Press » links for 2008-06-13

Prophet King Governance Press » links for 2008-06-13 — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 04:33:37 +0000

[...] Maybe Maimed but Never Harmed › While fucking, I prefer to get fucked (tags: masculinity sexuality bsdm) [...]

By: curious4uboth

curious4uboth — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 09:51:22 +0000

ok: Breaking things down to the core..I now know I like sensualities from both M/F perspectives, top/bottom whatever(s) and am just sorry it took so long to acknowledge and understand such.
S

By: curious4uboth

curious4uboth — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 09:31:37 +0000

Distinctions among those of us who R eagerly accomodating and desperately receptive/ and pre-cohesive 4 1 another…. as predisposed & instinctively ready 2 be wide astride accepted, openly accomodating, w/craved perspectives and mirror imaged vulgarity… aligned to complement beyond the heterogenous not maligned as that which violated such as the magnanomous!!!

By: maymay

maymay — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 15:27:58 +0000

Every instance I find of assertive, well-adjusted, happy male submissives makes me feel better.

It’s been my experience that assertive, well-adjusted, happy male submissives don’t find the BDSM “Scene” to their liking, for obvious reasons. I was certainly, and am still struggling in some ways, to be happy, or assertive, and though I am much more well-adjusted now I certainly was not when I first found that community.

I’ve seen happy, assertive, well-adjusted people of all stripes come to TES meetings and the like and then never, ever return. I’m even friends with a few of those people now. There are countless others. I am amazed at why more people don’t question why that is.

You are right about Bitchy, she is an awesome sexy writer, however I often feel that as much as she is indignant at the pressure to fit the stereotypical domme image, she doesn’t deviate from focusing on an idealized macho version of male submission.

I feel that too, though I wouldn’t begrudge her that; that’s what gets her off. Seems logical that she should focus on it and there really isn’t enough of that to go around in this community, either. I’m all for a greater understanding of differences in male male submission. :)

By: Crown Vic

Crown Vic — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 07:12:26 +0000

Wow that sucks – you are as plugged-in as anyone I can think of and the main contact you have with similar guys is as a result of them hitting on your girlfriend. Weird sub guys acting like one-dimensional 12-year-olds isn’t helping the situation. Every instance I find of assertive, well-adjusted, happy male submissives makes me feel better.

You are right about Bitchy, she is an awesome sexy writer, however I often feel that as much as she is indignant at the pressure to fit the stereotypical domme image, she doesn’t deviate from focusing on an idealized macho version of male submission. But I realize it’s just sex.

By: maymay

maymay — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 05:48:58 +0000

Perhaps I should have stressed more forcefully in my post that when I’m talking about getting fucked, I’m not necessarily talking about getting penetrated. A man with an erect penis can actually get fucked—fucking or getting fucked does not have a one-to-one relationship with one’s anatomical genitalia.

That said, I don’t see why men who top shouldn’t be able to get it up the ass if they want to. Again, topping or bottoming does not have a one-to-one correlation with whether you are the “active” or “receptive” partner in a sexual encounter.

By: Travesura

Travesura — Wed, 28 Nov 2007 21:44:42 +0000

This is one of those topics that I’ve had to come to grips with in my own practices.
I see myself primarily as a dominant heterosexual male, but I’ve thoroughly enjoyed receiving penetration, and actively engage in the practice.

For the most part I really identify with Bitchy’s post, with the added bonus of being a boy who spends most of his time playing with girls. It’s been uncommon in my experiences with images of dominance and submission to see someone in such a role taking it in the ass, since that’s such a symbolic image of role-reversal in this culture. It would seem to contradict my self-aware hyperbole of being a man topping a woman, as well as negating the virility and masculinity that can commonly become associated with hetero male doms (if only in some sort of collective imagination of kinksters). For the most part it was just a matter of ignoring some of the common subtext of these actions and simply seeing them as things I thoroughly enjoy doing. As a top I’m certainly going to realize those situations which I can derive great pleasure from.