Comments on: “Finally! Something that speaks to dominant women!” they said

By: Orgasm control through Trial and error: in light of bad advice « Kink in exile

Fri, 23 Mar 2012 04:57:23 +0000

[...] First some gems I’m steeling from an advice board maymay quotes here… [...]

By: Shifting the Discourse on Female Dominance « Topologies

Shifting the Discourse on Female Dominance « Topologies — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 01:09:37 +0000

[...] For me, this blog is a thank you to the stranger who answered my first call into the dark ten years ago, and to all the other people who’ve helped me learn how to figure out what I want and how to get it. (That’s the real trick. Not tips on dealing with outdated sex toys. Though really, both are valuable!) That, and it’s a direct response to May’s challenge for better resources, for Finally! Something that speaks to dominant women! [...]

By: La Phalene » Impressions of Being Stompy

La Phalene » Impressions of Being Stompy — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 03:01:15 +0000

[...] desperately horny, so being able to rank people by which end they hold the garden gnome for the yodeling garden gnome sex is intensely emotionally satisfying for them. Only I don’t fit the uniform for a dom. I’m [...]

By: Cinder

Cinder — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 17:25:56 +0000

Thanks, this was wonderfully insightful. Personally I tend to turn OFF if the other person gets too insistent about something. It might be the Sadist in me – if the other one likes it too much, where’s the suffering?

Chastity for me is all about control. We have just started trying to get the damned thing ON, and havent’ managed to get that far yet. he is terrified enough that all he needs to do is SEE the CB6000, and his balls crawl up and try to hide, and his dick shrinks and refuses to even get near the tube. It’s hilarious. his face is worth a study when he looks at me so offended because I am laughing at his suffering.

But he keeps trying, and sooner or later those balls will have strentched enough that I’ll be able to surprise them and trap them! That’s the turnon for Me: The resistance, the struggle, the victory, and then the control. The more I have to work at it, the more I want it. Yumm :)

Now, actually keeping him IN chastity once I am over that treshold may turn out to be boring. Who knows?

Cinder

By: Rika

Rika — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 13:08:01 +0000

Maybe better late than never:

Please take a look at my book, “Uniquely Rika” (www.Lulu.com/content/1923165) – or through Amazon, B&N, Borders, etc. You’ve hit the proverbial nail on the head…this is what my book is all about. Hopefully, there is now a reasonable resource that speaks to dominant women and also educates the men who truly want to serve us.
- Rika.

By: “This Is You” - Outtakes « Lady Lubyanka

“This Is You” - Outtakes « Lady Lubyanka — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 11:42:55 +0000

[...] maymay Saturday, 7 June, 2008 at 04:30:59 IST It wasn’t the lack of public response this woman got in the group, it was the lack of apparent compassion at all, whether that be public or private. But that’s the first and the last thing I’m going to say to you about this topic, because we’ve had hours-long conversations about hypocrasy before and, frankly, I’m going to choose to spend by energies somewhere other than on you now. [...]

By: This Is You, Yes YOU. « Lady Lubyanka

This Is You, Yes YOU. « Lady Lubyanka — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 22:18:45 +0000

[...] I really recommend that you read my sources, because the elements I pick out and identify as problematic may be difficult to fully [...]

By: QueSera

QueSera — Sun, 11 May 2008 02:29:34 +0000

Just wanted to pipe in and say that my partner and I have a fully functional d/s relationship. I appreciate your blog because it resonates with us too.

I have in the past struggled with the “sex is what he likes” paradigm. It is so at odds with the internal knowledge that I am sexually dominant. I’ve tried to ignore it, fight it, work with it. Most of the time just being the confident person I am has allowed me to cope with this pervasive (even into my mind) mindset. Maybe age has helped too. But there have been times when I really ranted about it.

I’ve never owned a chastity “device” but we do play with chastity at times. We don’t do it more, precisely because it is not that great a turn on for me. I tend to choose what we do, and I tend to choose things that are the biggest turn ons for me, although sometimes I choose my partner’s biggest turn ons, because as lalouve said, I get turned on by his responses too.

Because I choose, I free my partner from ever having to worry whether he was pleasing to me, or whether I was happy with what we did. And I am freed from worrying about whether sex is going to meet my needs or feel one-sided. When any of these feelings happen, we can at least know it was my choice.

Fortunately we are well enough matched that there are no yodeling gnomes under the bed gathering dust.

By: graylion

graylion — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:06:41 +0000

*waves at maymay* just wanting to say hello as lalouve's husband. as for good recipes (referring to the note below the posting window), have a look at my LJ, I sometimes post some. graylion

By: Bitchy Jones

Bitchy Jones — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 12:44:19 +0000

I don’t know what to say. What I feel like saying is ‘arrgh’ and kicking stuff.

I thought this would be reasonably easy to fix. I thought this problem was pretty obvious and if I pointed it out people would just say, oh, yeah, and fix it.

Well, that was probably stupid, but really, you do have to wonder why femdom (and by femdom I really do mean submissive men) has such a huge problem with female sexual agency.

Also, this comment by Dev:

It drives me nuts that every enquiry or discussion about femdom is about how to make it hotter to submissive men – as though that is the problem with femdom, that submissive men don’t find it hot enough. It’s crazy.

Genius!