I fight hate by talking about sex—very, very loudly

Regardless of who you are, it’s too easy to hate when you feel like you can’t fuck the way you want. That’s why I advocate for sexual freedoms: to destroy a cause of hate.

Hi, I’m maymay. When I’m not writing computer code of one sort or another, I’m summarizing news articles, blog posts, and other media for the occasional sexuality netcast I created and co-host, Kink On Tap, I’m empowering sex-positive activists and educators to put together low-cost, high-value, fast-paced, user-generated sexuality conferences called KinkForAll unconferences, or I’m jetting around the country speaking about issues like gender justice, community organizing, politics, and of course, technology. Unsurprisingly, this means I’m censored in a bunch of places.

I’ve been a member of alternative sexuality communities since 2002. In 2006 I began volunteering my technical talents, starting with Columbia University’s BDSM education group, Conversio Virium. These days, I mostly enjoy melding sex-positive activism with innovative technical projects.

Here are my favorite kinds of collaborations:

When put in my place, I play well with others! ;)

Technical consultations

Hey, maymay! We’re working on this project to reach people who don’t yet realize why they should care about sexual freedom, but we’re bogged down in menial tasks like copy-and-paste and endless email. Can you help us figure out how to automate the mundane stuff so we can work more effectively and get our message out there?

Or…

Maymay! We’ve got this great idea for a sex-positive campaign, but we have to learn to speak in 140 characters (or less). Can you work with us to translate our idea into a website and social media presence that will help the right people find us?

Are either of these you? Send me an email, tell me about yourself and your ideas, and I’ll be overjoyed to help you out. (And if they’re not, I can probably still help by connecting you with someone else to mind-meld with.)

Public speaking and advocacy

In a button-down white shirt and jeans, Maymay prepares for a five minute "lightning talk" at Ignite Sydney in 2009.Since I merge technical expertise with sex-positive advocacy, I often tackle myriad interrelated topics. I give seminars, lectures, and run workshops concerning things like sex and censorship, gender and technology, and online privacy and reputation management. Take a look at a listing of all the things I’ve done for an overview and more samples.

Next, send me an email to book me for a conference or other appearance at your organization.

Here are my limits:

  • While I’m an exceptional web developer (by which I literally mean that I’m “an exception to the rule”), I’m not a designer. In fact, I’m colorblind. So if you’re looking to make something look pretty, rather than work smoothly, I can collaborate with a designer to make sure your form jives with your function, but I can’t be your artist.
  • I have many of my own projects that nourish my soul and while I’ll probably get super excited about your idea (because I get that way about awesome new ideas), I probably won’t be able to commit to your project unless you pay me to. And although that’s just the way the cookie crumbles, that doesn’t mean we can’t work out some kind of work-trade arrangement. In fact, I love negotiation. ;)

That all being said, I’m constantly looking for new opportunities to develop additional skills, workshops and finding new places to teach. So, if you have something in mind, don’t be afraid to ask!

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How to support me:

Producing the thought pieces, personal stories of triumphs and tribulations, and contributions to academic discourse on sexuality published at this website is my job, offered free to the world. Please help me keep doing this Work.

I appreciate your support!