Formerly a free software programmer “by day” and a sexual freedom advocate “by night,” Maymay has been an outspoken member of kinky, queer communities since 2002. Now a full-time activist, writer, and public speaker, they frequently examine cultural and political issues ranging from censorship to community building and beyond on his blog at maybemaimed.com. Using an interdisciplinary approach that treats sexuality as a lens on the rest of life, Maymay also hosts the Internet talk show KinkOnTap.com, authors the explicit photography blog MaleSubmissionArt.com, and founded the all-ages KinkForAll.org series of sexuality education unconferences. Since its inception in New York City in 2009, educators and activists brought KinkForAll to 6 cities across America including Washington, DC and San Francisco. Until September 2012, they served as the Chair of the Technology Special Committee for Conversio Virium, America’s oldest student-run BDSM education group.

Maymay’s seminars have been featured at conferences from coast to coast, and they regularly inject sex-positivity into each and every community they geek out with. His presentations, lectures, and workshops focus on queer identity and experience, sexuality, media and censorship, gender (with a focus on masculinity), technology, and especially the intersection of these things. As a social justice technologist, maymay rallies hackers, Makers, DIY enthusiasts, environmentalists, and myriad other groups to support sex-positive feminism. As a sexual freedom activist, maymay works to connect enclaves of the sex-positive movement with one another through the power of the Internet and social networking.

As a sexually submissive man themself, maymay is also known for challenging deeply-held beliefs about “kinky” sex by exploring common visual depictions of sexually dominant women, and especially submissive men. His work has been featured by the internationally-distributed counter-culture publication Filament Magazine, feminist books such as Reclaiming the F Word, and academic works like Playing on the Edge: Sadomasochism, Risk, and Intimacy. Maymay’s theorizing draws heavily from the free and open-source software movement, whose principles of transparency, accessibility, and diversity underpin everything they do.

Interviews, publications, and press (a partial list)

Speaking and performance (a partial list)

Publications management and community organizing

  • Founder of KinkForAll sexuality unconference series (March 2009–Present)
  • Creator and curator of Male Submission Art, a crowd-sourced erotic photography blog. (November 2008–Present)
  • Producer and host of Kink On Tap, an Internet radio talk show (May 2007, and October 2009–Present)
  • Chairperson of the Technology Special Committee and contributing editor for Conversio Virium. (January 2007–Present)