This one’s easy and yet the difficulty with which most people who participate in the BDSM Scene get this wrong speaks volumes about their ignorance and complicity in oppression culture. So easy, this whole post could’ve just been the title: Never, ever assume you need permission from a dominant person to speak to a submissive [...]
Archive for the ‘D/s dynamics’ Category
Never, ever assume you need permission from a dominant person to speak to a submissive person
16 Jul 2012 at 15:20
maymay
Beginner BDSM, D/s dynamics, Myths and misconceptions, Politics of sex, Rant, Stupid dominants, Stupid submissives
“Good boy,” and other kinds of complicated sex
31 Mar 2011 at 12:54
maymay
BDSM psychology, BDSM terminology, Beginner BDSM, D/s dynamics, Politics of sex, Sexism
Imagine my pleasant surprise when my Internet radar picked up a great post by a thoughtful new feminist BDSM blogger. FeministSub has a thing or two (or three) to say about the phrase “good girl” worth pointing out: “Good girl.” I don’t think there’s anything that captures my mixed feelings about submission like that phrase. [...]
How to maintain a not-fucked-up D/s relationship
28 Oct 2010 at 23:06
maymay
BDSM psychology, Chastity/Orgasm denial, Communication, D/s dynamics, Sex
Knowing that something I’ve done has made it easier for other people to live the sexually fulfilling lives they want is sometimes the only thing keeping me alive these days. So I was more than a little chuffed to read that Thumper drew from a post I wrote in 2007 called “How not to fuck [...]
What will it take for the silent majority to speak up?
24 Jul 2010 at 16:58
maymay
BDSM psychology, D/s dynamics, Femdom, Male sexuality, Masculinity, Myths and misconceptions, Politics of sex
I am uniquely privileged: because of my relative self-sufficiency, I am loudly, unabashedly out of the closet. This gives me a certain power; I make no bones about wielding it. Unfortunately, not everyone enjoys the ability to be wholly and publicly authentic about who they are because standing up for what you believe in can [...]
On Dichotomies that (No Longer) Jail Me – KinkForAll Providence
08 Feb 2010 at 14:37
maymay
BDSM psychology, Communication, D/s dynamics, Kink events, Male sexuality, Masculinity, My Videos, Myths and misconceptions, Personal experience, Politics of sex, Vanilla life
Being someone’s fucktoy: Who’s objectifying who?
30 Oct 2008 at 21:42
maymay
BDSM psychology, Blowjobs, D/s dynamics, Male sexuality, Myths and misconceptions, Personal experience
Being home alone is sometimes really great and sometimes really dangerous. It’s great because I am often at my most productive when I have a silent, empty apartment and I’m alone with my thoughts. I guess this is where my muse is. It’s dangerous because I never know what my muse is going to inspire [...]
