This is majorly cool: Viviane linked Orgasm Logger in her Links for January 4th, 2008 post and it’s since been picked up by Boinkology, and a few higher-profile bloggers are beginning to display Orgasm Logger counters on their sites, too, like Tom Paine. A few months ago, a search for “Orgasm Logger” revealed only a handful of hits but now Google shows over 1,300 results, which is quite a bit for a project I put a single night’s effort into months ago primarily for my own, personal use.
I’ve also been seeing discussions about Orgasm Logger surface on message boards and other blogs every so often. It’s a lot of fun to read through the discussions people are having and to see what they’re saying about it. Here are some telling examples.
This woman, on an Informed Consent discussion thread, says:
Having orgasms isn’t a competitive activity, it’s just something that happens, or doesn’t and it certainly shouldn’t be used as a measure of anything. In my opinion.
I have to say I agree with her regarding her view on the usefulness of orgasms as a competitive measure, but I disagree that it shouldn’t be used as a measure of something. Measure of what is the question. Well, I think that’s up to the person doing the measuring.
I never think of orgasms as competitive, just a lot of fun. They’re fun to have, and they’re fun for some of us not to have, and the fact that some of us are having more than others is also a lot of fun for some of us. I don’t think there’s anything in this world that turns me on more reliably and so thoroughly as watching my lover have a screaming-good orgasm. For me, when she has ten or twenty, or maybe even a hundred and I haven’t had one, that’s an even sexier thought. I like the disparity in the numbers, but I don’t feel competitive about it.
Naturally, kinky people into chastity play and orgasm control see the value of this tool really quickly. Later in the same thread, another woman writes:
I think the ‘logging’ idea would be a nice little extra feature for those who do chastity play.
And then another guy echoes her sentiment:
I can imagine it might be of use if a man were in a sort of chastity arrangement without a device i.e. based on trust, and monitored by a domme at a remote location.
Curvaceous Dee is (fittingly) ahead of the curve by already having experienced first-hand the intent of Orgasm Logger:
It was a great relief to finally come again. The very useful Orgasm Logger has confirmed to me over the past few months what I’d suspected for a while—that I like to get off every couple of days. Doesn’t matter too much whether it’s self-pleasure or pleasure with partners (both have their moments), but, almost like clockwork, every two days on average will see me gushing, groaning, and generally feeling great. Which explains why I’m always running out of ‘bedroom towels’….
Indeed, as she points out, keeping track of stuff let’s you know more about that stuff.
Here’s another blogger’s comment, one I really love:
I clicked, and found out this guy had his last [orgasm] 3.58 days ago, and this is a feed from an actual Orgasm Logger site! What an add-on to one’s blog! The ultimate in advance orgasm management strategy systems!
The ultimate in advanced orgasm management strategy systems? I think this blogger coined a new acronym: OMSS! Naturally, I can think of dozens of improvements to Orgasm Logger so I’m not going to be calling this thing “the ultimate” any time soon.
Of course, Lux of Boinkology said it best:
We’re both fascinated and confused by this application
In fact, that’s been the most common reaction, and it’s really interesting to me. Long before I created Orgasm Logger, I’d just been naturally keeping a tally on my orgasms. It seems to me like most everyone does this, if only not as mindfully as I do. Of course, what made me mindful about keeping track of my orgasms in the first place was my near-fetish for orgasm control, in a sexually submissive headspace.
I got really serious about keeping track of my orgasms about two years or so before I created Orgasm Logger. At first, I simply wrote down when my last one was, so I’d always know. Then I wanted to be able to easily share that piece of information with Eileen, so she’d be able to know whenever it interested her. To make that happen, I started recording my orgasms as events on my personal calendar, publishing those events as an iCalendar to a local WebDAV server I run for the two of us here at home, and then subscribed her iCal to the calendar feed I was publishing.
It worked flawlessly. Now I had a real database of all my recorded orgasms with embedded date and time, location, and participant information! It was pretty much all I needed. But it wasn’t perfect.
It didn’t do the things I was most interested in, which was tell me at-a-glance how long it had been since my last orgasm, the most personally interesting datum. I had to do that calculation every time I wanted to know. What’s today’s date? When was the date of my last orgasm? What’s the difference between then and now?
Obviously, computers are the answer to computational problems, so I started thinking about how I could get the computer to do everything I wanted. In the process, it occurred to me that lots of people heavily into orgasm control are always talking about “how long it’s been” or “what their last one was like.”
Hell, people who aren’t even kinky are talking about their orgasms left and right, up and down, inside and out, this ways and that ways! Moreover, the entire political debate over contraception, abortion, teen pregnancies, abstinence-only sex education, and a host of other issues, are all centered around exactly this topic: orgasms!
None of this would even be happening if it weren’t for orgasms, but I’ve yet to hear someone acknowledge that simple fact. It’s as though, if you were an alien, you’d think orgasms were what made the world go ’round, but nobody was allowed to talk about them directly.
Which brings me to my point. Orgasms are really important for a lot of people. What’s interesting, then, is why it’s so puzzling to so many people that I’ve made a tool to help people keep track of them. After all, throughout history, the one thing people have continued to do with nearly no change in behavior at all is come up with ways to keep track of the stuff that’s important to them.
No value judgement, no assumptions, just an awareness of what’s important to people and the benefits that can be garnered from using increasingly sophisticated tools to broaden that awareness. That’s what Orgasm Logger is about, for me. That’s what I think everything should be about, on a philosophical level.
No one would have looked at me askance if I wrote improvements to banking software, because money is very important to a lot of people. That’s why it’s tracked so rigorously. That’s why it’s used as a competitive measure of status, of wealth, and of many other things, even though a lot of us think that it shouldn’t be.
Why, then, do orgasms seem so out of place? Maybe the answer to that question is also the answer to a lot of other things that we as a country, a culture, and a species, are struggling with. Maybe understanding value, understanding why the things that are important to us are important, things that are currently so deeply ingrained in the cultural tropes of our society that we don’t even realize we can question, will help us in ways we can’t even imagine today.
That’s what I’m puzzling over.
Update: News of the existence of Orgasm Logger is still spreading, and it’s still getting the typical, puzzled and, in some cases, even hostile reactions I can pretty much expect from the mainstream world-at-large. Latest sighting was at a site called Dear Sugar.
by Tom Allen
10 Jan 2008 at 15:41
I started recording my orgasms as events on my personal calendar, publishing those events as an iCalendar
I started using a timer program and keeping track of them on my Palm. It was a countdown timer (how many dauy until xxx), but it worked just fine as a countup time, and you could see how long it had been at a glance.
Not that I ever had much of a problem there. :-\ When you haven’t come for 42 days, you sort of have a mental clock going.
No one would have looked at me askance if I wrote improvements to banking software, because money is very important to a lot of people.
Bad analogy, May. More orgasms don’t make you more or less wealthy – they have an intrinsic value to you and you alone (and okay, a small value to your partner). However, you do ask a good question in wondering why people are so surprised, almost as if tracking them is unwarranted.
Reading around the blogging world, one finds people in bad relationships in which one partner complains about the libido disparity (usually a High Libido Partner complaining about a Low Libido Partner). Bringing up an argument about “the last time we had sex” is often viewed as a cheap shot, but sometimes it’s instructive to both parties to see objectively just how long partners go.
I once had a LLP who swore that we had sex “almost every week” (as if it were a lot). I started keeping a calendar, and for several months I tracked that we had sex maybe once every two or three weeks (no, I can’t imagine why someone wouldn’t want to have sex with me three times a week, either). When I brought this up in our joint counseling session it became a very objective point, instead of her saying that I was “oversexed” or “perverted”, we could actually discuss the issue at hand.
Umm, of course, we didn’t have sex for at least a month afterwards, though, because I made her feel embarrassed in front of the therapist. But now I’m rambling…
by maymay
10 Jan 2008 at 16:14
I don’t see how this doesn’t work, possibly because you and I may understand money differently from one another. The point I’m making is that neither orgasms or money have intrinsic value. Both are valuable because of some other reason, such as what they can give us, how they make us feel, what we enjoy doing, and so on and so forth. Of course having more or less orgasms don’t make you more or less wealthy, but frankly neither does money.
And if you disagree there, then I’d challenge you to reconsider your definition of wealthy. What makes a rich man rich, Tom?
by QueSera
11 Jan 2008 at 16:21
Ha, Tom. You post reminded me that I did the same thing with my ex. He complained about how infrequently we had sex, so I started keeping a log. Turns out we had sex far more often than he remembered. His cries of “once a month, at best!” turned into, “oh, once a week… at worst…” I kept that log going for about two years, just to have good solid data. I later realized that part of the problem was that alcohol was affecting his memory. Oh well, good riddance. But the sex was good.
More on the topic, I love the idea of orgasm logger. I remember taking a look, but I think it didn’t work on mac-only platform. Once I get the new OS, I’ll be trying it.
by maymay
11 Jan 2008 at 17:40
QueSera, that’s kind of a hilarious story. Good solid data is often more illuminating than many people realize.
by SJ
12 Jan 2008 at 11:43
My reaction to orgasm logger, which I hope proves illuminating.
It would not have occurred to me to log orgasms. I see how it is useful to people, and I could probably find other ways to find it useful for myself. Still, I find it uncomfortable to gather any sort of metrics about myself. I find it more uncomfortable to publish those metrics, or allow them to be in someone else’s control.
Maybe the puzzled people are puzzled about the privacy implications. Why would someone publish this? Why would someone allow someone else to track this? But I think also the degree of automation is confusing to people – particularly people who don’t have a clear sense of how much or who little time and effort would be required to create the tool.
by Curvaceous Dee
12 Jan 2008 at 23:22
And I still really appreciate the orgasm logger, May :) I find the information it provides me about myself fascinating, and being able to go back through the log is really quite interesting.
There are definitely changes/improvements that could be made, but even as it is, I find it invaluable.
xx Dee
by tom paine
13 Jan 2008 at 17:18
Sex shouldn’t be competitive, but we’re humans, and so we keep lists, accounts, records, etc. Right now I’m pleasuring two women at once, and it makes me feel better and younger than HGH!
by Tyler
14 Jan 2008 at 12:09
I’ve always understood the fantastic uses Orgasm Logger might have. I never really found it confusing, but then again, I didn’t find it on my own. You introduced me to it.
The only problem I see is that I’m the one who has to log them, and I’m usually not conscious enough to do so right after I’ve had one, which means I forget all the time. As you may have noticed, I have not logged into my account in quite a few months. What would be truly revolutionary is if you could create some tool which monitored peoples’ bodies and kept track of their orgasms (and you know, every other bodily function, 24/7). I wonder what those same confused parties would think then.
by SJ
14 Jan 2008 at 12:41
Tyler:
You’re basically talking about human telemetry. Such systems have existed, particularly in the space program. Currently, there are lots of telemetry options for humans, most of which are uncomfortable to wear.
As for how they would feel about it, I think it depends on who has access to the data. If you do, and you control who else can access it, then it seems like it could be a very useful thing. However, if people can crack access to your telemetry, and use that data to their own ends, even if not directly to your detriment, I think such a system would be difficult to live with.
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[…] he started tracking in November of last year. Â I should say, he started tracking for me in Nov, he’s tracked for his own interest on and off for much longer. Â Then we fell off the bandwagon for a couple of months while a lot of his orgasms and edges were […]