Posts Tagged ‘kink’

According to their customer records, FetLife is a porn site, not a social network, whose paying customers are 13 times more likely to be rapists than non-paying users

There was a predictable outcry from pro-BDSM bloggers like Rebecca Hiles when the “FetLife Meat List,” a simple spreadsheet cataloging the FetLife usernames and basic profile info of 30,000 users who identified themselves as female and under 30 years old, was released. But as usual, all Social Justice Warrior rhetoric condemning the list was shortsighted […]

Remember, remember.

I met Staci Newmahr shortly after I turned 18. At that time, the pseudo-public playspaces and “dungeons” of the early 2000’s S&M subculture defined “young” as “anyone who was not yet 40 years old, or 35 at least.” Despite being about a decade my senior, Staci (who would go on to author a widely acclaimed […]

What’s the difference between choice, permission, and consent as a felt sense?

The Rolequeer blog is having a conversation with an erotic author going by gleefullydepraved who misused the word “rolequeer” in a fascinatingly disturbing way, unsurprisingly, given their nom de plume. You don’t need to read their conversation to understand this essay, but it might provide some useful context to my remarks. I’m responding to gleefullydepraved […]

Invasion of the Spicy Vanillas

rolequeer: themerrymisnomer: rolequeer: themerrymisnomer: rolequeer: I am dying with laughter. Wasteland, Europe’s biggest fetish party that advertises as ‘the wildest party on earth’ halted the sale of tickets for their 2015 party to keep out ‘housewives in jeans who read Fifty Shades of Grey’.  Their public statement that their party is about ‘a lifestyle’ that […]

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